Anxious

Anxious 

I can't concentrate.

My mind's a mess.

Cluttered.

Anxiety's cruel grip tightens around my throat.

Constricting the flow of sweet air.

Heart racing.

Legs weak.

Hands shaking uncontrollably.

Tears resting at the rim of my eyes.

My demons dining heartily on my weakness.

Again.

Beyond the Great and Terrible Ten

Beyond the Great and Terrible Ten

Indescribable, unfathomable and relentless.

The emptiness of falling into a never ending  abyss so dark, no light could ever penetrate it.

Pain so deep, that it goes far beyond a scale of one to ten. Agony that makes you pray for death.

Unrequited love or lost love.

My Pillow

My Pillow 

If my pillow could talk, you would know all my secrets.

All the times I cried, yelled and screamed into it, to muffle my pain.

You'd see all the dreams I dreamt of you. All the pleasantly vivid and the heartbreaking nightmares.

You'd know how many times I woke up screaming from premonition like visions and salty waterfalls streaming down my face.

You'd know how I pray for you and your happiness, nightly.

If my pillow could talk, you'd know how deeply I truly love you.

The Beast

The Beast

She loved fiercely and with the entirety of everything she was made of.

Her heart bruised, busted, and broken, but still beating.

Everyday she struggled against giving up on her belief in true love. Fighting to keep that tiny shred of purity and innocence alive.

The continuances of heartbreak thrashing upon her like a Leviathan. Determined to conquer her and extinguish that glimmer of hope.

Gone

Gone

I drink a lot more, since you've been gone.

It only helps me sleep, when I can't; which seems to be nightly.

The only positive thing I get from it, is having constant dreams of you.

Holding and caressing you.

Getting your intoxicating scent upon my fingertips.

Only for me to awake with my throat drier than a desert.

Desperately clinging to rapidly fading dreams, just for additional seconds of bliss.

My soul, desolate without you.

Restless

Restless 

Tossing and turning.

Desperate to find some comfort.

First too hot. Then much too cold.

Sheets messy and jumbled, like the thoughts in my mind.

The weight of infinite pressure upon my shoulders, keep them feeling like a slab of cement.

Meditation is of no avail, for the silence only amplifies the voices in my head.

Nowhere to escape. Not a soul to comprehend what's in my mind, without questioning the validity of my sanity.

So I put on a smile and say "I'm fine".

Death of a Valkyrie

Death of a Valkyrie 

I wanna to cry out loud, but I can't bring myself to do it.

I wanna cry out for someone to console me and understand, but I won't; for it makes me look weak.

So I scream into a fluffy pillow to muffle the sound, so the neighbors won't hear through thin walls.

Hope they're oblivious to the sound of my soul dying.

The deafening sounds of a Valkyrie having her wings ripped from her back.

Her heart gutted out, by the one she loved with every inch of all her lives, past, present and future.

Salty tears blurring her vision.

Sobs choking her to dry heaves.

Clutching the left side of her chest where the source of the pain radiates through her body.

Practically paralyzed from the indescribable pain.

Praying for the end of existence, to escape wave after wave of pain crushing what's left of her shell.